Shit you Bitch.

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Hello big boys and girls,

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I haven't been blogging

for the longest time...and not intending to.


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1 Dollar

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I've just registered to take my car license this morning.


Big shiet, bic boy.
Coconut on apple tree. FUCK.


I can't comprehend a single shit on the theory handbook.


God damn it.

Fuck my life big time.

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I'm gon' undress you.

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Gonna meet my sugar frosted pie later.

*Swoons!*

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Sorry to interrupt.

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REGINA OOI KE JIA
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GO AWAY!
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STOP READING MY BLOG!
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SHOO! SHOO!
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SHOOOOOO!!!
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Grrr..

I'm watching you.
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The art of fart

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When I poo poo..

I have the habit of tracing the stretch of popped out floral patterns on the wall tiles with my fingers.


It's kinda relaxing and.. I don't know...

Kills the boredom perhaps.
Constipation can be time-consuming..
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Fallow Mellow

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Yesterday I dreamt that I bought marshmallows..




Exactly like these !


Just as I was about to eat it,


Suddenly, I found myself surrounded by a bunch of bitches.

I threw an unfriendly glare at them and stuffed the marshmallows into my mouth.


Then. one of them spoke up.


"Eh. Why you eat tampons..."

O.O! *GAGGED*

Then I choked on my own saliva

and woke up...

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Yet another

ridiculous dream..

Sigh.

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My dream screams IDIOTIC.

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Yesterday I had this weird dream.

I was being haunted and hunted down by these bunch of banglas just because I accidentally appeared in their photos.

Like you know, I just happened to walk past when they pressed down on the shutter.

And KA-CHAK!


But... What the fuck..

Why must those banglas

in my dream be such misers!

Developing photos must have cost 2 dodo birds and 1 big foot .

Precious until only can have their face in the pictures.


Grrr...


As if their descendants will mistake me as their pioneer ancestors and start thinking that tsunami is good for washing their citizens clean .


Actually it only wipes your citizens out CLEAN .

Alright. I know..

It's just a damn dream..

Anyway...

I got real pissed and started to scream the hell outta them...

Then suddenly Jt miraculously emerged from the lynch mob.

Acting as the mediator.

Actually I wasn't really sure whose side he's on.

But well,

I was so furious I could commit a crime, perhaps a rape.

So I ran away.

Jt then gave chase, in attempt to calm me down.

I stomped into Teck Whye market and started wailing away.



Me: "Go away! Don't bother bout me!"

Jt: "Stop...! Where are you going?"

Me: "I don't know! Stop following me!"

Jt: " Don't keep walking! Calm down, just listen to me..."

Me: " Don't want! Just Go away luh!!! "

Then, out of sudden.

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Jt: "Eh. Wanna buy lantern?"

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Me: " Okay."

WHAT THE GUAN YIN MA.

HAHAHAHA!

Why oh why.

Why doesn't my dreams

reflect some intellect in it..

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Google's failing..

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Can someone please tell me

who on Earth invented aglets?

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I REALLY WANNA CHANGE THE PICTURE (on the left of my blog) OF GABRIELE FALLOPPIO (who invented condoms) TO THE GOD DAMN MYSTERIOUS GUY WHO INVENTED AGLETS (even if he looks like Shrek).



If you happened to know, or the person is your great(x infinity) grandfather's neighbour's cousin's employer's son or something.

PLEASE LET ME KNOW

I BEG YOU.

(Desperate cries)

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Mid autumn ...

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Oh boy! I swear I hate having a stranger guy in my house.


It doesn't mean I dislike di di as a person.


It's really god damn uncomfortable.


Especially in this ALL-GIRLS-SINCE-THE-LAST-DODO-DIED house.


I just feel so ... OEI! WHAT THE FUCK!


I was lying comfortably on the couch in my classic carefree posture,


Slack and shag.


Limbs all stretched out.



Then, within split seconds I've to spring up and get into my decent ah gua pose.

ARGH !!!

Disrupts my peace.



I'm so pissed I can almost phase into a werewolf on this full moon night.
(and join my handsome Jacob Black.. Hee. )




Anyway, this mid autumn festival I've no one to loving loving romantic with.

GRRR..

Better go phase into a werewolf.

Bye bye.

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Sheesh

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Tanjong Pagar's korean restaurant has very chio korean waitress...
PS: Xin, I'll bring you there after your A'levels okay?



Look at our local waitresses... *tsk tsk*
Ah lian, Ah soh and Ah tiong .



All in all, I'll never bring my boyfriend there.

No way, over my dead body.

And it's the only place in Singapore that makes me feel like a foreigner.


Everybody speaks korean except me.


Well, actually I could jolly well speak hokkien and curse the hell outta them. WOO!


God knows the waitress may be smiling at me while saying,

"Fuck your fugly dog face, bitch."

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Whatever luh.

In that case, fuck yours too.

(Not that she really said that. But anyway God knows.)

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Damn .

I shall stop here.

I got to go pee.

Bye bye.

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Strange Range

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I eat pineapple with salt.


Green apple with plum.


Strawberry with sugar.
(I just ate a whole punnet of it)


Guava with black paste and chili.

Yums.

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Love Hate Relationship.

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Aww.. You're indeed cute...
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BUT !

Are all korean guys male chauvinist pigs?

I am one

female chauvinist sow

too okay.

Grrr.. No wonder he pisses me off sometimes.


And the communication break down is so arghhh.


Half of the time I'm explaining myself and the other half he's punching his electronic dictionary looking for words.

HAHA.

It's so

ARMPIT-HAIR-RIPPING-LY

FRUSTRATED

at times.

And and and...


Why must there be so many rules and regulations while dining ?!


I just wanna eat in peace. . . piece. . . . . PISSSSS.


Grrr.. Why must I pour soju for you huh?

Why why why!

WHY YOU TELL ME?

Stupid luh.. Why you can hold the soju cup with one hand while I must hold it with both?


Huh? Huh? HUH?

WHY??!!

Aiya! You're so irritating luh.

Shoo shoo. Go away...

Alright..

Shall stop all my hullabaloo.

Bye Bye.

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